Totally had a moment of clarity this evening from one of my fucking fabulous followers. Had a lot of messages from girls who've been through abusive relationships which makes me feel like I'm not alone but this little gorgeous genius said to me something along the lines of I'm feeling like shit and missing him because he still has control over me.
It was all about fucking CONTROL
Over ME!
I'm overjoyed and livid with myself at the same time. As IF I'm sat here crying my eyes out over some guy that basically was trying to control me and coz he couldn't he felt the need to belittle me in the only way that would defo work...physically.
He was working in Jennys bar in town I can say that now he's been sacked but anyway he was on shit money and so I was paying for everything and he was living in my house and I got him everything he had. Like bank account and phone contract and even took him the dentist to get his teeth fixed as he'd had his front 2 broken in a barney years ago.
He wouldn't even have fucking teeth if it wasn't for me. And the cheeky twat had the cheek to sit there and say HE felt controlled. He's out of fucking control that one.
I feel so much better this evening but I'm not sure if that's just the Valium but sweet lord above we have had a moment of clarity. Control. Yeah well control me now dipshit and watch what happens x
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